Thursday, April 2, 2009

"wow"



When I went to save this picture it was titled "wow" I think that sums it up quite nicely.

Monday, November 17, 2008

Funny election words

I haven't had much time to post to dear ole blog and other VS contributors (ahem, this means YOU) haven't been of much help the past few months due to something called the "election." Whatevs.

So to that end, I present you election words that are completely innocent but sound oh so dirty.

Grip & Grin
Pork
Caucus


Change is coming to Washington. Some hope it's for the best, others hope Mr. President-Elect does horribly in the first two years that a Republican Congress is elected in 2010. Who knows what will happen, but change is coming. Good or bad. And I'm excited.

Oops, sorry about that. This is supposed to be only funny stuff.

Well how about this:

"...and I can see Russia from my house."

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Words only DC residents understand

We here at Vocabulary Shenanigans reside in numerous states and non-states around this fine country of ours, but a large portion of our authors and thought-leaders reside and/or work in our Capital.

Just a few words that are really, only for DC folks. We say them. We get them. For better or for worse, we are them. Enjoy.


Vocabulary Shenanigans presents:
DC Dictionary

urban dictionary for DC-ites

Adams Morgan: The one place in the city that anyone can afford to get completely trashed. The stench of alcohol from the metro to Columbia Road is evident starting on Thursday around 6 p.m. and doesn't end until Sunday afternoon (or once Football starts, not until Tuesday morning). Every male under the age of thirty has their "going out shirt" on, blue or white (maybe some striped!) button down, untucked, "vintage jeans" and shiny shoes. Look at My Striped Shirt might have been written for all of those guys.

crackberry: this one isn't new by any means,but needs to be put out there. Your company issued Blackberry isn't exactly as cool as you might think it is. Is there really a need to be in contact with your boss 24/7 and constant re-checking for new email messages? No, I didn't think so. See also: Hill Hack.



crashing:
used in describing one's workload coming to a screeching halt because your dumbass can't keep deadlines straight and/or can't handle stress or change very well.

"Don't talk to me right now. I'm crashing. "



DC uniform: For the ladies it consists of a black skirt suit, collared button down (maybe a color! Red for power, perhaps!), pointy toed heels and pearls. For the men: suit with white or blue shirt and standard-issue tie. On Fridays, maybe a pink shirt. DC summers are hot, but that doesn't mean the DC uniform changes much, except for the men, when it is completely acceptable for them to wear head-to-toe seersucker.

Group House: a large home (at least 3 bedrooms, 2+ bathrooms) that houses any number of post- grads who can't afford to live on their own (see: Hill Hack) so they combine their forces and are stronger as one! Cheaper per-person rent! Lower utlitiy bills! Food sharing! Common room furniture! All sounds good, except one thing: group house (=?) slow people?

Hill Hack: hopelessly pathetic individuals who settle for a pittance salary by convincing themselves of their unquestionable self importance, resigned to "importance by proxy" -- only using their boss' name in describing their existence while unabashedly dishing out business cards -- even when NOT prompted. And lets not forget the blackberry. the silver star of Hill Hacks. Be sure also to leave your green Hill Hack Identification Card in full view, so everyone, once again, can be reminded that you didn't spend 4 years in college studying U.S. News and World Report while your roommates were playing beer pong for nothing. All those hours watching C-SPAN must pay off for something! So be sure to let everyone on the train know that you are big time, and you came to DC to play.

Metro Couture: Rainbows, Manpurses, and the iPod. Let's not forget a copy of the Economist. Everyone knows you're not reading it, but that intern over there will think you work for the CIA and definitely have sex with you. If the Economist doesn't work for you, steal your neighbor's copy of the Wall Street Journal on the way out the door of your group home and stash it in your Jansport messenger bag that you pass for a briefcase. Chicks dig stock quotes. even if you don't know how to read them.

WashingtonOneUp: when the day/experience/meeting you had proves how much more important you are than anyone else in the room.

chelski: "meeting got canceled, which is better in the long run anyway--too much work to get done today. I am very important, you know."
The Suit: "I had a meeting at the White House today. I totally "WashingtonOneUpped" you today."

What about you?
Do you have any words to add to our DC "Urban" Dictionary?

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Those crazy internets

Who doesn't love a good "your mom" joke? Certainly no one here at VS.



I'm off on vacation bitches, have a great Labor Day!

Friday, August 15, 2008

Proud to be American....

We here at VS are proud to be all born in the US...well except for one person, but she came over to our side ~10 years ago and now has a US passport to prove how much she loves the good ole US of A.

We are also big fans of the Olympics. Some of this sport others of this sport..or perhaps just of this athlete, or this one, or that one, or him, him and him.

So in honor of the Summer Olympics, we at VS wanted to dedicate some space to funny things said, usually completely taken out of context, but still absolutely hilarious.

Weightlifting commentator: "This is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw
her snatch this morning during her warm up and it was amazing."

Dressage commentator: "This is really a lovely horse and I speak
from personal experience since I once mounted her mother.

Tennis commentator: "One of the reasons Andy is playing so well is
that, before the final round, his wife takes out his balls and kisses
them... Oh my God, what have I just said?"
I'm sure more good things will come from Beijing in the coming weeks, please feel free to add your own in the comments section!

Peace out brotha

Friday, June 27, 2008

Friday is fun day!

It's June 27th which in hockey terms means it's just a few hours until the free agency crazinessness begins.

Since many of us over at VS love the hockey, today's Friday Fun Day picture is from Japers Rink in response to the NHL.com "leak" of Ovie winning the MVP award a few weeks ago. The t-shirt was made available online before the awards show, therefore tipping us all off (as if Malkin even had a chance) that AO would be the 2008 NHL MVP winner.
How can you not LOVE this guy? He scores a shitload of goals in a season. Takes down Danny Briere. Goes to the Allstar game and racks up a huge room service bill for Cindy Crosby. Brings his team from basement dweller to the PLAYOFFS for the Stanley Cup. Makes the big man work for him. Has awesome highlight reels on youtube and channels dedicated to him. And scores this goal. And to top it all off has a girlfriend he met on the Russian equivalent to Facebook.